Month: March 2012

  • Everything has been going well...except for one (not so) small detail. I have gestational diabetes. Yee-fucking-haw. It's totally manageable, like having Type 2, but if I'm really unlucky diet and exercise just won't cut it and I'll have to take insulin. I can't see it getting that bad though, unless I was lazy and just kept eating crap all the time. If anything this will put a fire under my ass to eat better. I still have to go to a diabetes clinic on Monday morning, but I'm already taking steps to head in the right direction. Frankly, I'd do the test again a little later to confirm that I do indeed have it. I posted about it in due date club and a couple of ladies came back saying they initially tested positive, but did it again at a later gestation and tested negative. The only thing is that they could have only done the 1 hour test, while I did the diagnostic 2 hour tolerance test. I don't think I could have screwed it up either because I fasted for 12 hours instead of 8 and only drank one cup of water for the whole two hours I was there.

    I've been feeling totally fine, though. I don't know what it feels like to have blood sugar levels too high. I get shaky when sugars are low, but who doesn't? This might explain why I gained so much weight so quickly while other ladies in my due date club are doing just fine. I weighed myself at work this morning and I weighed roughly the same as I had on the 20th at my midwife appointment. Obviously I am gaining weight regardless of how much fat I'm putting on because baby girl and my uterus are only getting bigger and, therefore, heavier. Whatever, I don't want to think about weight gain, or at least MY weight gain. I'd rather focus on baby's weight gain and ultimately keeping her at a reasonable size at birth. I'll be damned if I push out a 9 pound baby! So I think it's good to gear up and gain control of my diet now before SHE starts to really pack on baby fat in preparation for birth.

    So my focus is on eating more vegetables, cutting down (if not out) on sugars, and cutting down on my carbs. I considered going back to a gluten free diet, since eliminating wheat would be the ultimate diabetes "fuck you", but I'm just not into committing that fully. I still want to eat bread and a muffin or a bagel here and there. It will be tricky to moderate how much of that I eat. I still want to eat whole and ancient grains, and sadly gluten free replacements are merely made of rice tapioca flours with some flax seeds thrown in. Not good enough for me. I'm selectively choosing gluten free foods, like gluten free pasta noodles. I'm cutting back on cereals because they're nothing but carbs and sugar. I'll eat granola instead as it's high in protein and made of oats, not enriched wheat. On my days off or days I start in the afternoon I will make an effort to eat a REAL breakfast with eggs. This is how I'm thinking and this is where my effort is going, but for all I know I could be doing it wrong. I'll see on Monday when I consult with the doctor.

    Oh boy...my belly is getting big enough that I feel short of breath while sitting.

    Anyhoo, last weekend we had a 3D ultrasound done. It was both entertaining and educational. I know what my baby's up to in there and why I feel her kick only in certain spots. She occupies the right side, with her head at the top and folded her half. We watched her as she sucked on the cord and her knees and tried to such on her feet. It made it a little tricky to get a good picture of her, but we did manage to get some. It was pretty awesome to see her move about, try to grab her leg and shove her foot in her mouth. She got frustrated at one point and made a fussy face. That was pretty cute. All in all I feel like I know her a bit better. She's got a face and a little personality. I'm betting she'll be the kind of baby who will want to be swaddled with a pacifier in her mouth at all times. I'm cool with that. I want to swaddle her while she sleeps at night anyhow since it's supposed to help babies sleep longer by both making them feel safe and preventing them from startling themselves awake.

    Her kicking is getting stronger and I feel it more frequently throughout the day. She's been on the quiet side today, but she has really active days and really quiet days. I usually whip out the doppler on the quiet days. Nate felt her kick of the first time last night. He wasn't sure what he felt so he asked "Was that it?" and I had to confirm with him, lol. In a few weeks her kicks will be unmistakable to him and we should start to see her move too. I haven't seen anything yet thank to that cushy anterior placenta, but they day will come. All in good time. I may not ever get a distinct foot or hand poke out, but it'll be cool to see my belly morph into a different shape as she moves.

    To put the cherry on the top of all this I'm getting over a cold and have been for a week. That's unusual for me. I rarely get sick and when I do it lasts 3 days at the most. I know my immunity is down from being pregnant, but it would be really nice to pop my ears and breathe through my nose again.

  • Can I shoot myself now?

    Yes, I'm sorry. This is basically another rant.

    My work is starting to get REALLY irritating. I deal with customers for 8 hours a day, and work in a place that has its fair share of regulars. It's one thing to talk about my pregnancy with coworkers. It's another to talk about it all the time with customers.

    I'm sorry, but since when is it a customer's business to question me about my pregnancy? I get that it's exciting, especially for some people who aren't pregnant. Some people just LOVE seeing pregnant ladies. That's fine if they want to get an eye full, but I'm getting sick and effing tired to hearing: "I didn't know you're pregnant!" (Good for you!) or "When are you due?" (July...no you don't get to know the actual date!) "How far along are you?" (Far enough that I'm outta here in three months.) or "Do you know what you're having?" (Why? So you can tell me I'm going to have a great time or that's too bad boy's are easier?)or "Do you have any cravings?" (No and wipe that look of surprise off your face.) and my personally HATED favorite "How are you feeling?" (SHUT UP!)

    AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHGHGSHGSDKFHGSKLDFJLKSDJFLKJDLFGKJ

    It's none of their buuuuuusssiinnneeesssss.........I've already decided that if they ask me about names I'll tell them I have one, but I'm not going to tell them WHAT it is. I draw the line at sharing her name. But I would really like to draw the line at the first question. It's a such a hard thing to deal with. How can I express that I don't wish to talk about it with strangers and be polite about it?

    And then there's all the unsolicited advice. Heaven forbid I ever mention a symptom, for example heart burn. "Oh, it's only going to get worse!" Ha f*cking ha! As if I'm not aware of that! I don't need customers telling me how bad it's going to get, or how wonderful they are once they're here, or how excited I must be getting. I. KNOW. I'm here, I'm getting there, and HOW COULD I NOT BE?!

    And then there are the wives' tales. Oh how I hate the wives' tales because my pregnancy is blowing quite a lot of them out of the water. Yesterday I had a regular customer (crazy old bat, I might add) who ARGUED with me about the gender of my baby. She asked about cravings and was so beside herself that I don't have any. Then she said that if I'm not craving dairy I'm having a boy. End of story, apparently. I said, "No, I'm having a girl." She said, "If you're not craving dairy by now, it's a boy. I've been there and done that." I just said, "Well my ultrasound said it's a girl." DON'T ARGUE WITH SCIENCE! She didn't say anything after that. What. The. Heck? 
    Later that day I think I scared another woman by pregnantness. She stopped in her tracks, looked at my wearily and asked, "Is there a baby in there?" Uhh..excuse me? What else would it be? Then mumbled something about gas that I didn't hear twice, helped her and had her on her way while I sat there scratching my head wondering what just happened. Either that woman is scared of pregnant ladies, or she thought I was THAT bloated. What is going on?!

    Then today, I had another customer tell me that my maternal glow made her want to cry...*crickets* Say what?

    So another three months of this....can I deal with it? I certainly hope so. I'm losing it though. It's exhausting me. I don't want to spend my off time with anyone other than my DH because I'm so mentally exhausted from these people. *Sigh*

  • Wow...22 weeks. Where has the time gone? I'm now rocking a sweet bump that's only getting bigger.

    And oh! Since I haven't been on here in two weeks. It's girl My anatomy ultrasound went well. She's healthy as far as the tech told me. I'm sure I'll get the detailed lowdown at my next midwife visit on the 20th and she must be in perfect health otherwise I would think my midwife would have called me and asked to see me sooner so we could further investigate.

    She's kicking up a storm, especially in the last couple of days. Her kicks are getting much stronger. I feel like I'm missing out a little because I have an anterior placenta that's cushioning a lot of the blows. So I feel the kicks really low and and (starting to) feel them really high near my belly button. In between is like a dead zone where the placenta must be. I really hope it doesn't take away from those magical moments when she tries to push her hand or foot out through my belly.

    Her heart beat is hella strong too. I've been listening to her heart beat every day with the doppler since I got the thing at around 13 weeks. It helped me get through my annual Mexico trip without worrying about her. Before it was a nice wooshing sound in the typical heart beat rhythm, now it's a strong and blatant thump that distorts on the crappy speaker no matter the volume level. Feeling her movement is curbing my compulsion to listen to her though. I really look forward to 4 weeks from now when I can't ignore her kicks even if I wanted to. I can't wait to feel her hiccups.

    So far I've gained about 20 lbs, give or take. I'm not worried about it like some would be at this stage. I expect I'll gain between 40-50 lbs altogether. While I won't be solely relying on it to help me lose the weight, I imagine that breast feeding will help quite a bit. But it's not like I'm worried about fitting into those pre-pregnancy jeans or whatever. Maternity jeans are just as useful postpartum. I'm more concerned about moving comfortably and without pain. So far I think my trips to the chiro are paying off. I need to see her again, actually, but not till next week.

    As it happens with pregnancy, my feet are starting to ache more often than not. At work I'm suffering so yesterday I bought some trainers that are totally against dress code, but I don't care. I need my feet to be comfortable. Besides, I think my pants will cover most of them anyway. I also bought them half a size bigger to accommodate any foot growth that may happen in the following weeks.

    I have less than 4 months left of work. pleased And four months until our lives change forever.

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